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"I hope my dog never realizes I’m filled with bones."
"Grandpa’s Breath would be a TERRIBLE scented candle."
"Do heavy breathers have giant lungs…or tiny nostrils?"
"Quarterback…nickel defense… the dude that came up
with football must have really loved coins."
"Socks are basically just little underpants for your feet."
"Without football, tailgaters are kind of just loiterers."